Stay Tuned
July 24, 2012

To all my loyal readers—please stay tuned as I will be updating this publication. For those who are new, please enjoy this 1920s saga. Always inspired, Eleanor


Looks can be Deceiving
October 16, 2011

Peaceful activities can be very deceptive. Especially when it seems too quiet, as it has lately around the streets of Chicago. There is a growing unrest that cannot be denied. As prohibition advances through the decade, it inspires tremendous growth in the very vice it aims to eliminate. Good intentions can have unexpected consequences. They can even backfire. So it is with great concern that The Chicagoan is on the lookout.

Observant citizens can’t help but notice that the city is growing very quickly. Unlike in a small town, new faces don’t stand out very much; they are expected. But there is some strange behavior that is starting to get noticed. Men in expensive suits are gathering in small groups on street corners, standing too close together, whispering, and glancing about. What is of particular concern to this publication is that many of these frequent but short meetings are happening just outside The Chicagoan office. Granted there is a popular shoeshine stand positioned at the corner of the building, but informants coming in and out of the office with scoops seem to feel a bit intimidated by the well dressed men standing about.

Business is business and everyone understands that. Each has a unique way of conducting it and Chicago has proven itself as quite tolerant. However, there is a difference between tolerance and denial, between naïveté and skepticism, between seeing the good in people and being prepared for the worst.

shoe shine stand activity

Shoeshine stand is strategically placed so any action can be seen up and down Center Street. Mister Moorlord keeps his shoes in top condition while he stays current with published opinions. Mister Cascone happily gives these well-known shoes their continual perfect patina.

It is particularly notable that Mister Shepham Moorlord always has the shiniest shoes. If anyone has important business to discuss with Mister Moorlord and has the guts to interrupt his reading of The Chicagoan (and less reputable newspapers sprouting up in town), he can be found frequenting this particular location. Served by Mister Vinny Cascone, it is a good idea to make friends with this more quiet and unassuming fellow first. Mister Cascone has been around town all his life observing and making smart associations, but not astute enough to elevate his profession from shoe shine to dreams of influence. Perhaps, though, much like a barber, he is in a great position to gather and pass on information, thus making his home life a bit more comfortable than the meager salary from his modest enterprise might allow. Maybe the tips are particularly good for a man with his experience.


Mister Carrollo is barely communicative, Mister Colosimo sees more than he tells, and Mister Tony is seen everywhere.

Several of the newcomers of mysterious business must go unnamed because they won’t respond when questioned by reporters. Only Mister Carlo Carrollo was polite enough to offer a minimum of introduction. Most of these men don’t use too many words. And the words they do use are spoken so low and quietly, it is hard to hear them. They will not repeat themselves either. In fact, they ignore everyone who is not of their own kind—except for their gracious lady companions who dress as nicely as they do. Leading the group of fashionable “businessmen” is Mister BigJim Colosimo who likes to observe more than be watched.

Mister Fat Tony is also a known name about town, though he is as tight-lipped as his colleagues. Hopefully the good citizens of Chicago will not let these “businessmen” (who lurk outside the Chicagoan office) deter them from doing their civic duty by dropping in with tips to enrich this publication with different views and understandings.

(Photos by Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord)

For information on upcoming activities please see


Historical notes:

The romance and the glamour of gangsters in the 1920’s has given Chicago its continuing international reputation. The drama and intrigue are played up; the sordid and evil are swept under the rug. The SIM is realistic in its gathering of fashionable and questionable characters. It portrays the gradual decline of legal power as the decade progresses. By 1929, the year of the infamous massacre, morals in the city had degenerated to the point of alarming the average citizen. Ringing the downtown business district, private speakeasies and brothels were almost beyond counting. While bootlegging flourished and businesses profited, the influx of questionable characters also increased, seeing a marked rise in the crime rates.

At the end of the decade, several developments occurred that concluded the culture of the Roaring 20’s—as if someone threw a switch. First the St. Valentine’s Day massacre stirred the attention of tax payers who demanded that something be done. Secondly, the stock market crashed that fall, plunging the entire country into depression and transformed gangsters into heros. But not yet. The SIM still stirs with those last days of the decade—days of more unsavories joining the population and more women seeking some of the world’s oldest professions. Organized crime is inspired by prohibition to develop a powerful black market; the structure continues today in the SIM as well as in the real life city. The black market grew from alcohol to arms to prostitution and to countless “reputable” front businesses. It spread its tentacles into every level of society. This assembly of mysterious “businessmen,” secretly led by warring puppet-masters is replayed on these streets. Citizens beware.

Jazz and Pizzazz
August 29, 2011

Perhaps Chicago is a place of extremes. A city that inspires the most notorious crime is also the city that celebrates with the most exuberance. A city that creates barons of industry is also the city that defines cultural relevance. Attracting such a melting pot of citizens from all over the world is destined to define American values. Chicagoans are not shy about expressing opinions and preferences. Citizens undoubtedly represent the honest opinions of most people, just voiced a bit louder.

When a new club opens, there have to be patrons from every social strata. This is what makes Chicago so colorful—the accessibility and fluidity of social groups. Anyone who’s reputation needs to be improved can do so simply by shopping on Michigan Avenue, presenting an attractive silhouette, and showing up at the right places. An opening is the best place to make a personal statement and to interact with the rich, famous, and infamous.

celebrating new jazz club

The new jazz club was just filling up with regular and new residents when Miss Olinger (who doesn't like to be called Officer when off-duty) and Miss Zarco made their entrance, dancing. Mister Seranno took his usual stance on the side of the room that would make others the most nervous. But Mister Moorlord (who no longer wants to be called Chief when off-duty) and Misses Huntress Moorlord seem to easily ignore his presence. Fortunately for the other less oblivious partiers, Miss Olinger joined Miss Medier at the side table and Miss Zarco took charge of Mister Seranno, captivating everyone in the place.

The arts always flourish on a rich soil fertilized by social variety. With the opening of Jazz Alley, an impressive display of patrons set aside all other obligations and were determined to be seen—representing every strata of society. From the wealthiest guy in town, Mister Shepham Moorlord with his starlet wife Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord, to socialite and mischief-maker Miss Wilamenia Zarco, to the most loyal of all attendees Miss Stormy Pixelmaid and Miss Bea Shamrock, these ever-popular partiers were joined by the not so popular and usually stiff Mister BigJim Seranno and not too vigilant but always gorgeous Officer Chandler Olinger. Those two, of course, ignored each other totally.

But Miss Zarco is never to be ignored. Center-stage or center-party are her only comfortable positions. Not wishing to share the limelight with anyone, she demonstrated a little drama when reacting to the new movie-star young and vulnerable Miss Hannah Heir. Put two attention-grabbing women together and there is bound to be trouble. Most of the patrons politely ignored the drama between the two women, though they were completely impressed when Miss Zarco convinced the suspected-nondancer Mister Seranno onto the floor! No one present has ever seen him dance before. No one present thought the guy even capable of moving his feet very often.

Wila captivates BigJim

Miss Zarco never walks into a room; she dances, making an always memorable entrance. Flaunting her exceptional fashion style as well as her social influence, Miss Zarco has evolved from the fun young girl who arrived from the east coast into a lady of significant connections. She is the perfect example of how to get ahead in a city like Chicago: look great, captivate through humor and charm, get adopted by the right families, and make the most influential friends. Miss Zarco knows how to take advantage of opportunity. At least all of her friends hope so. Because if she doesn't know, who does?

Smart citizens tend to avoid Mister Seranno because trouble follows him like a shadow that never catches up. He is suspected of everything but no evidence ever is conclusive to reveal active involvement. Generally he hovers in the back ground, chuckling, puffing on his cigar, and piercing anyone near with his steely blue eyes. Yet somehow, while twirling Miss Zarco around the floor, the spellbound observers might, just maybe, have caught a glimpse of a softer side. It has been reported that one particularly observant patron saw him crack a smile—just for an instant—but swears it was there!! But Miss Zarco has that effect on people. Why should such a crusty guy like Mister Seranno be immune from her charms? And the increasingly larger diamonds appearing on Miss Zarco’s fingers, wrists, and around her neck would indicate that her relationship with Mister Seranno is prospering.

Within the show of such famous characters enacting out their preferences publicly, the new owners Mister Jhonny Dawlish and Miss Alinore Somerset blushed with pleasure at the attendance. Chicago has the reputation of being both the most dangerous and the friendliest of all big cities (again such a place of extremes!), so this entrepreneurial pair has bet their life-savings on this location. Charming and hidden, the new club will be well-known once those who missed the opening hear about its fantastic support of local performers. Formalizing the new musical jazz form into a club legitimizes many an aspiring performer. Soon the club will be commanding the best and the brightest, increasing the variety of great venues thriving here.

fashions show off women attendess

The women of Chicago definitely make up for in fashion what the men lack. So fun to be recognized at this cultural event, showing off the best dresses for a speakeasy evening ignites competition anyway. Miss Shamrock is always perfectly attired for any event, Miss Pixelmaid always dresses for fun, Miss Brooke fits right into styles of her new home, Miss Heir expands her starlet reputation, Miss SageWoman Juneberry always looks comfortable and cool.

It pays to know how to make the right friends in Chicago. The crowd attending and watching we so spellbound by the spectacle of Mister Seranno dancing in the center of the dance floor (versus glowering in the corner making people nervous as usual) that no one was surprised when they won the $1,000L prize for Best Couple. How could anyone possibly vote otherwise—assuming there was a vote? Even Mister Seranno seemed quite pleased with himself when he chuckled in acceptance of the award: “see what a little arm candy will do” and later “amazing what a tall blond does for an old guy.” Miss Zarco responded by batting her eyelashes.

generous new hosts

Mister Dawlish seems to be friends with Mister Seranno, especially because while dancing with partner Miss Somerset, he seemed to have a good time despite being watched. Then, while awarding their new influential patrons, Mister Dawlish and Miss Somerset gained many new friends. They are sure to be successful with their new speakeasy jazz club through their great taste in music, fantastic host and hostessing skills, great charm, and generosity. Chicago is delighted to welcome such upstanding and considerate new entrepreneurs.

The Best Dressed Award went to Miss Shamrock. Though gold seemed to be the preferred color of the evening, or black for those ladies who wish not to be noticed, Miss Shamrock dazzled in her silver and white ensemble. Annoying to those less well-dressed and with smaller budgets, it always seems that Miss Shamrock is the best dressed at every event.

In all fairness and because there were no single males to collect the Best Dressed Man award (no surprise considering how men in Chicago tend to dress), two honorable mentions were created to honor newcomers Miss Diana Brooke and Miss Heir for $250L each. And through greater generosity, Miss Somerset declared that because of her love for fringe dresses, she honored this writer with acknowledgment of $100L. Such actions are sure to make Mister Dawlish and Miss Somerset very popular in Chicago. They have not only opened the hottest new club in town, they have ingratiated themselves with their neighbors in a very charming and approval-gathering way. And they are very nice people. Chicago always welcomes new residents that are so appealing.

Finally, Miss Pixelmaid, the consummate event-attender, summed up the opening of the new jazz club the best through a single word: “swanky.”

The Wonders of Woodrunner
July 11, 2011

In a very great city, there are always hard-working individuals that provide a backbone of talent, entertainment, and the enjoyment of finer things in life. The Chicagoan set out to find one person to exemplify all three. There is no other that better expresses Chicago’s appeal than Miss Una Woodrunner.

Beginning her Chicago career as a disc jockey (DJ), Miss Woodrunner owes much of her start to the culturally dynamic duo of Mister Shepham Moorlord and Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord. When Miss Woodrunner stepped off the train from New York (she will not reveal her reasons for leaving the other biggest U.S. city), she knew that she needed to discover the most powerful people. That requires ASKING the right people, so she sought out the owners of the classiest club in town: The Fiume. One afternoon, dressed impeccably, Miss Woodrunner visited the nightclub, tastefully an hour before opening. When Mister Moorlord first laid eyes on Miss Woodrunner, he knew that they could do business together. He was quick to introduce the stunning brunette to his wife, and fortunately for him, they became fast friends.

As readers know, Misses Moorlord had owned the hugely popular Colosimo’s Restaurant. With an insightful perception, she always sizes up every interesting newcomer to tap the best talent. With flair for entertainment, Misses Moorlord was thrilled to discover that Miss Woodrunner had performance experience. Colosimo’s was at its peak then, as this was prior to the tragic murder that signified the popular restaurant’s demise (or maybe it was because the owners went on to bigger and better things).

Long-time residents will recall the twinkly summer evenings spent first dining on Mama’s great cuisine while entertained by Miss Woodrunner’s eclectic recording collection. Walking off a full meal, no one can forget strolling through the park as the music wafted out from the restaurant’s windows. All admired the city’s unexpected beauty and its expected elegant entertainer! Although soft-spoken, Miss Woodrunner exudes confidence and composure. She lives to please her audiences and customers through a consistent dedication to her craft.

Una as DJ

Miss Woodrunner hostesses as a DJ at the best private speakeasies in the city: The Boom Boom Lounge and The Chop Shop.

While The Chicagoan searches to profile role models in Chicago, there are so many opportunities for courageous women that the fairer sex often dominates these pages. (Perhaps this should be a message to the guys to become more creative. Or maybe it is because there are less guys around since the Great War gobbled up so many.) The women of Chicago represent the best of hard-working professionals. Miss Woodrunner’s career is an exemplary example when creative thinking meets opportunity.

Una attends events

Miss Woodrunner is always seen at the hottest events in town from the St. Valentine's Day Ball to east side blues clubs, to St. Patrick's Day celebrations. She is always perfectly attired and tries to always be appropriate.

To settle in with a good salary as a DJ, Miss Woodrunner added more gigs such as the Chop Shop and, eventually, the most-popular Boom Boom Lounge. She continued her dance classes and practiced everyday, filling in as an understudy to advance her skills. Since a little girl, Miss Woodrunner has dreamed of being a dancer more than any other preoccupation. Her greatest joy comes from pleasing others with her talents. Uncommonly beautiful, she even defies many of the current fashions such as bobbed hair and flattened chests. More than half of Miss Woodrunner’s growing fans are male, and because her goal is to please, she knows how to use her beauty to provide. Miss Woodrunner is very respectful of fantasy and the freedom to pursue the imagination. She lets no grass grow under her stilettos while she is also one of the most dependable workers in town!!

Una performs at home

Even at home, Miss Woodrunner demonstrates the ultimate in glamour. Multi-talented, she entertains her more private guests with a special ambience.

When astute businessman Mister Moorlord opened The Empire Burlesque Theater to showcase his wife’s dancing (thus propelling her to stardom), he had his eyes on Miss Woodrunner as well. Through her husband’s recommendation, Misses Moorlord collaborated with Miss Woodrunner, finding that they both share a vision of building larger audiences.

Una dances

Miss Woodrunner demonstrates her flair for the dramatic by dancing at The Empire Burlesque.

On Saturday nights, growing crowds are enjoying the ever-changing and dazzling acts these two glamor girls create, alongside Miss Mercedes Faith. There, Miss Woodrunner is in her glory. Collecting admiring and delighted stares is like a shot of adrenalin to her—it provides a thrill for her that is unparalleled by other activities. She describes: “The burlesque combines my talents with my poetic [albeit erotic] expressions, love of costume, and development of drama. I enjoy sharing my fantasies with others, as I believe they have them too.”

Shep supervises

Mister Shepham Moorlord, dressed more casually than usual, supervises the staging of Miss Woodrunner's latest act.

Even though her performance star is on the rise, Miss Woodrunner has another side to her character that pulls her ambitions: her long-term goal of having a tea/flower shop. At heart, under all the finery and display, beyond the tantalizing and teasing, Miss Woodrunner values the finest things of life: beauty, friends, and quality time.

Un poses as candy

Miss Woodrunner looks appetizing while she poses at the beginning of her candy-dancing performance.

It is understood that many who move to Chicago want to forget their past and get a fresh new start. Though irresistibly mysterious, Miss Woodrunner’s silence about her history demonstrates her discretion. And her hardworking record in Chicago demonstrates her solid character. She deserves to be rewarded with the ultimate dream of her own shop, which landowner Mister Moorlord is more than happy to rent to her.

Una at her shop.

Miss Woodrunner's flower shop is the height of sophistication and elegant beauty, much as the lady herself. At the end of the day, Miss Woodrunner is a lady, albeit one that has lost her inhibitions

Miss Woodrunner enjoys a lifestyle of the deepest enjoyment. From afternoons on her terrace to evening performances, she never experiences a dull moment, and neither do Chicagoans who are grateful for her devotion and contibution to the city’s culture.

Una hostesses

Miss Woodrunner entertains her new good friend Miss Medier, who makes friends with all those whim she interviews.

Behind Closed Doors
June 20, 2011

If anyone is wondering why news in Chicago is so quiet as of late, it is because citizens are operating quite stealthily. Everyone knows the gangster groups are in conclict—but they have burrowed beneath the streets with secret and secure tunnels by which to continue their ambitious commerce. Quite practiced and adept at avoiding police, these less than law-abiding citizens are sneakier and more creative than ever. Though Chief Chandler Olinger would not like to admit it, law enforcement has been lax, which really doesn’t express the half of it!

shooting at the blues club

Gun fire breaks out at the Naked Blues Club. But dancers, so used to such mischief, obviously continue dancing.

The Chief has fallen in love, and those who have experienced such an affliction can appreciate the distraction that it can cause. She has even been seen gazing into her intimate’s eyes and dance while gun fire exploded around her—but again, this is behind closed doors.
shooting at blues club

Jake Hanson is a hero as he battles the unknown gunwoman who burst into the blues club. The ladies finally realize the danger and duck to the group to avoid the cross-fire.

Nonetheless, there has been no shortage of frivolity. The burlesque is steaming through Saturday in full tantalizing color, the Chop Shop rocks on Sunday night with comedy and spontaneity, and Wednesday night is soulful when getting lost in Doctor Heavy’s blues.
audience enjoys the burlesque

Miss Bea Shamrock with Mister Jakob Faulds, and Miss Gwendolyn Jenivive with Mister Clyde Haven, enjoy Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord's creative disrobing.

So perhaps the citizens have the right idea: maybe ignoring the bootlegging, occassional tommy gun battles, and unsavory characters wandering around late at night is the best policy. Afterall, these things are going to happen anyway. It is easy to blame prohibition for all this mischief, but boys will be boys. And it is the opinion of this respected publication that prohibition is not only an inconvenience, but actually inspires new ambitions.
fun at the blues club

Miss Tiffy Vella and Judge Want2 Tinkle entertain visitors at the blues club when Doctor Heavy Writer was busy in his first duty as the city's reigning medical professional. Old dear friends of hostess Miss Eleanor Medier, they sit up late at the bar talking.

In the meantime, not advocating that anyone break the laws, if any citizen has a suggestion for a better policy, please step forward and help Mayor KJ Kiranov who, by the way, is still on his (what now is of record duration!) honeymoon. And citizens seem a bit miffed about losing out on the pleasure of seeing a big flashy wedding—especially because First Lady Xyza Armistice Kiranov is a fashion leader! Everyone misses out on how much style she would display!

Every day in Chicago is a great day for singing the blues:Doctor Foreman plays piano, Miss Lakelynn singing (with help from Doctor Writer's German Shepherd Muddy), Chief Olinger looks great in aqua, and Miss Beth Bonham demonstrates some creative new moves.

After a hard day of work, though it isn’t bad to shed working outfits and slip on the stilettos or spats, fringed dresses or fancy suits, and step out for the night. Just be sure to park close to the entrance, and carry a discreet pistol (with permit of course). Check with Miss Wila Zarco for suggestions on creative places and activities!

FLASH: Currents of Change
April 25, 2011

It does not pay to be complascent in Chicago. Happy with the reputation of being the ‘lightning city’ due to exploding population growth, the capital of the Midwest welcomes new citizens of all nationalities. Some of these transplants even arrived doubting that Chicago can live up to its reputation of being the friendliest city until they arrive and find everyone not only super friendly, but more than interested in doing business, and in details of their business specifically. Afterall, the city is determined to be strong in every aspect of the best life: agricultural center for fresh cuisine [everyone manages to ignore the wind when coming the wrong direction from the stockyards], business hub [never mind that much of the business is conducted under the table or in the back room], fantastic entertainment [growing ever-more risqué], cultural landmarks [well almost, if the tight-fisted politicians would loosen up some cash to increase the collection for the Art Institute or build some of the monuments that will be icons the future], sports center [ok—trying to be, but there are ambitious souls willing to recruit the athletes, thus trying to rehabilitate any criminals tendencies into healthier pursuits], and shopping haven [the classiest in the country have to be here]. Chicago, as a big city, for the most part, lives up to the reputation it covets, being willing to work hard because it is also the city of big shoulders. There can be no big shoulders without a strong body underneath them. Chicago’s body is its complex interweaving of leadership in every aspect of what makes a city great. That body needs a diet of new activities. Hence this week profiles the newest and the best to increase Chicago’s so well-deserved reputation and status.

• Boom Boom Booms and Rebooms

It can’t be easy running an establishment like the super-popular Boom Boom Lounge. Astute readers will realize that in the history of this publication, there have been two previous owners. Each of them went on to bigger and better things: Miss Gigi Gartenberg became Miss Roaring 20’s and is on the road representing this great city all over the world, though her behavior often inspires heads to shake. Then there’s Mister Art Clift who has taken his very popular show that premiered here to Atlantic City. Chicago hates when that happens. So many great talents begin here, get some recognition, and then get more acclaim elswhere. Perhaps Chicago is just an ambitious place by personality, giving so many of the famous their starts. The Boom Boom Lounge is one of those establishments that discovers music and good times and it is the city’s oldest and most beloved club. So it is with great pleasure that patrons welcome new owners Miss Faelann Magic and Mister Charlie Duffield to the arena of fine establishments in the city.

Boom Boom swings

Relaxing at the more mellow Boom Boom, Miss Medier dances with Doctor Writer, owners Miss Magic with Mister Duffield, Miss Bea Shamrock with Miss Beckye , Bernstein while Miss Jadelicious Crystal and Mister Jamesbrowne Barrymore observe, served by bartender Mister Jake Hansome and DJ Miss Una Woodrunner.

Those who love a great party will find a much more mellow Boom Boom this time—a place to forget the cares of the week, to socialize, and for some, to dance. Respecting the familiar and comfortable interior so treasured by loyal visitors, Miss Magic and Mister Duffield have preserved its authenticity. There are several landmark establishments expected as a part of Chicago’s character, and the Boom Boom is a classic. The new owners’ friendliness and easy attitudes make it a pleasure to relax and enjoy the engaging company.

• Blues Blast

Things were not so peaceful at The Naked Blues Club this week. In fact, the time of quiet so enjoyed this last few weeks may be coming to an end. Confidential sources say that gun sales are up. Trouser pockets have been visibly bulging more and lady’s purses have become larger. But the wariness is warranted considering recent events.

blues club

Miss Stormy Pixelmaid and Miss Sylvan Shilling relax in the sumptuous leather chairs while Miss Bea Shamrock and Mister Jakob Faulds dance nearby.

Doctor Heavy Writer, owner of The Naked Blues with Miss Eleanor Medier‘s assistance as hostess, welcome a great crowd on Wednesday night. Blues penetrates right into the souls of Chicagoans—they crave it for aesthetic and emotional fulfillment. Hearing the best, patrons close their collective eyes and sway to the music, transported into a thoughtless moodiness of tones and feelings. New friends are made that night as Misses Bessy Lyon Avon and Mister McCole (Cole) Avon show off their own great moves and sophisticated fashion choices. Conversations buzz in the background as famous blues artist Mister Ziffy Zarf checks the place out, an old friend of Doctor Writer’s and worth listening to at every opportunity when he performs around the country.

dancing to blues

Couples swirl and sway to the best blues in Chicago at the Naked Blues Club: Miss Medier with Doctor Writer, Misses Starla Hundress Moorlord with Mister Shepham Moorlord, Miss Shamrock with Mister Jake Faulds, Misses Lyon Avon and Mister Avon, and Mister Mikk Graves arriving.

But the peace and euphorial isn’t to last—unfortunately this is what happens in Chicago on a regular basis. Whomever invented the tommy gun must be getting rich these days with the number of them appearing around corners or in alleys. Maybe it is the popularity of the newcomers Misses Lyon Avon and Mister Avon, but as they leave a wonderful evening at the blues club, they are on their way home when shots ring out from behind the church! Misses Lyon Avon is struck down by what may or may not be a stray bullet! Officers are slow on the scene, but Doctor Writer isn’t, and assesses the situation almost immediately. Being a take-charge kind of person, he orders that Misses Lyon Avon’s be transported to the hospital. There, he is joined by the dedicated and multi-talented Miss Una Woodrunner, who’s abilities in caring for others cant be denied. Her skills as an attentive nurse are highlighted when she arranges that Miss Medier donateblood to save Misses Lyon Avon’s life. Not immune to performing heroics, Miss Medier doesn’t anticipate her wooziness afterwards but is always happy to be of service to those in need.

Bessy gets in trouble.

Bessy Misses Bessy Lyon Avon is shot by a possibly stray bullet while on the way home, helped by Doctor Writer who had just entertained the victim only half an hour before at the Naked Blues Club. The good doctor operates on victim, assisted by Miss Medier's donated blood and Nurse Woodrunner's tender loving care. As Misses Lyon Avion is recovering, she invited Miss Medier and Doctor Writer to see her funeral home that juste opened, bringing one notorious customer with them: Mister Phillip Linden, may he rest in peace.

No one can forget about the shooting, however, because poor Misses Lyon Avon is seen everywhere about town in her wheel chair, against doctor’s orders. The police, still consumed with solving the now world-famous Saint Valentine’s Day Massacre, have a major conflict at their door. With the world watching, it is embarassing to still not have suspects in custody for this shocking gang-related crime. Secondly, there is now a domestic shooting of a prominent and well-needed new contributor to the city’s infrastructure, also unsolved. With her family’s undertaker enterprise, every citizen in town will eventually need Misses Lyon Avnon’s services. But there are those who wonder if she almost was to be her own first new client in her adopted city! The attempted murder may be unsolved but it is not forgotten. It has all of her new friends on guard, practicing their weapon-shooting skills, and driving their cars a little faster, especially around corners.

• Enterprising Entertainers

Perhaps the most delightful of new features that elevates Chicago yet higher on the fashion and lifestyle status charts are two new shops. It is so inspiring to see that beauty and brains do go together. Both Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord (who doesn’t really need to work because she is married to the richest guy in town—how smart is that??) and Miss Una Woodrunner (who’s multi-talented skills and ventures never cease to astonish) are inspiring all who know them with their business acumen.

hat shop

Misses Huntress Moorlord sets a new standard of fashion with her recently-opened hat shop.

For Misses Huntress Moorlord, she is having the most fun. Famous for her fashion sense, she understands how accessories make the outfit. With the opening of her new hat shop right next door to The Chicagoan office, those on the east side are very grateful to obtain such sparkle to the hard-working hard-playing warehouse district that sports most of the city’s hottest entertainment spots: The Boom Boom, the Empire Burlesque Theater, and the Naked Blues Club. All lovely and elegant ladies will now be demonstrating their own great taste with seeing who can best wear Missess Huntress Moorlord’s styles, at the same also supportive of the wife of the richest guy in town. Chicagoans are smart that way.

hat displays

Hat displays show the innovative designs off as jewels ready to enhance outfits for all fashion-consicious ladies

Miss Woodrunner receives admiration as a hard working girl because she invests her earnings into her own business. Who works harder in Chicago than Miss Woodrunner? She DJ’s jazz tunes at the Chop Shop on Sunday night, she serves during the week as a nurse at the hospital, and her patients tend to recover faster at the prospect of going to see her dance on Saturday night at the Empire Burlesque Theater. If she isn’t busy enough working for others, she now has opened the shop of her dreams selling tea and flowers to enhance the ambience of what can sometimes be a rather dreary city. Bringing beauty, talent, and color to this hard-working town makes Miss Woodrunner not only popular, but increases her fame. Such commitment to aesthetics deserves to be rewarded.

flower and tea shop

Miss Woodrunner's flower and tea shop is strategically located right by the park, offering great view of gardens without and within.

Both famous and talented, these two beautiful entertainers continue to amaze fans at their range of successes. The stars feel so lucky to have more opportunities in the 1920s than their mothers or grandmothers had. Misses Huntress Moorlord and Miss Woodrunner prove that women can have it all, especially in Chicago.

flower shop patio

The flower shop has a great patio where shoppers can relax for lemonade with the park on one side and Lake Michigan on the other. Photograph by Miss Woodrunner.

• Civic Celebration

The best news of the week is that the Easter Picnic is elegant, civilized, and uninterrupted by any mischief of any kind for a change. It may be due to the fact that Mayor KJ Kiranov is on his honeymoon with Misses Xyza Armistice Kiranov. Trouble seems to drip from him like wax from a candle. Hopefully he can find some needed peace and quiet to reflect on his unnverving pattern of attracting criminal behavior. Perhaps his new misses can have a greater positive influence on his focus and commitment to his continued service to the people of Chicago.

In the meantime, those prominent citizens intown for the holiday weekend took a quick moment out of busy schedules and family commitments to congregate in the park. Catching up on all the latest news works both ways for The Chicagoan. Not only is it the duty of this publication to report on events, it is the duty of citizens to be sure to fill Miss Medier’s ears with information [and gossip] to help her jump to the correct conclusions. It is a public service to share tips and observations.

At the picnic, the recent shooting of Misses Bessy Lyon Avon was the talk of the hour. Mister Shepham Moorlord, so busy with several of Chicago’s most popular new enterprises and the guy who already owns half of the town, was shocked to learn of the details. However, Misses Lyon Avon’s descriptions of the shooter remain very vague (everyone consumed a lot of blueberry juice at the blues club), Doctor Writer, Miss Medier, and Miss Woodrunner, who all cleaned up and repaired the damage, were happy to give vivid descriptions of the drama from their after-the-facts points of view.

Easter picnic

Celebrators at the picnic on Saturday enjoy good juice and better conversation: Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord with her husband Mister Moorlord, Misses Lyon Avon in her wheelchair accompanied by her daughter Miss Whitey Lee.

Communication is always healthy for a community. Fortunately, Chicagoans love a party. As opportunities to see friends, catch up on developments, to show off great outfits, and to have fun, Chicagoans need a regular diet of activities. Happy to provide, vitality of change can be celebrated daily, assuming that stray bullets can be avoided.

• New Tradition Starts?

There is no end to amusement when inspired by good music and fine beverages. Every Sunday Miss Bea Shamrock serves the tastiest refreshments, Miss Stormy Pixelmaid offers the most hilarious and clever  jokes, and Miss Una Woodrunner uses her sense of humor to get guests to do what they normally would never consider. What self-respecting journalist can resist publishing these photos that show the folly of otherwise quite conservative and hard-working citizens? Holidays are designed to give a relief from the drudgery of everyday responsibilities. To let loose and act like rabbits is probably somehow good for the participant’s perspective, though elusive as to exactly how. Nonetheless, a good time was had by all.

bunny hop

Miss Una begins the bunny hop song, with an infectuous repetition. Mister Bronxx Moonwall leads the procession followed by good sport Miss Woodrunner, Miss Shamrock, Miss Pixelmaid, Miss Sylvan, then adding Mister Dijek Reichman.

bunny hop

Miss Woodrunner insists that she will not stop playing the bunny hop until ALL of the patrons join in—meaning Miss Medier and Doctor Writer who are so engrossed in each other's eyes that it takes them quite some time to realize what is happening. Sighing with resignation, they reluctantly join the line but soon are loosing themselves in the rhymn of "one-two-three, hop-hop-hop."

Even the generally stoic Doctor Writer joins in after consuming several glasses of blueberry juice, proving that there is no limit to the silly things a sophisticated guy will do for love. More hoppers join in as the squiggling line goes around and around the perimeter of the Chop Shop: Miss Dawn Michelle Zauber, and Miss Beckye Bernstein.

Bluesy Bliss
April 16, 2011

It doesn’t take Officer Chandler Olinger long to pick the right outfit. Being an avid—maybe to the point of addictive—music fan, nothing excites her more than the opening of a new club. This is a big week in Chicago for club openings—the first of which cuases her to stand at her closet door, considering what dress would best to show off her gorgeous figure and fantastic hairstyle. Though several may equal her, which keeps her on her toes, there is no one in Chicago that dresses better than she does. With a smile on her face, she selects her white silk with feathered headband from her favorite dress designer. It is perfect. And the opening tonight is a new blues club. When chatting recently with her close friend, Miss Eleanor Medier (editor of this fine publication), the words of this city’s favorite journalist (ok, the city’s only professional journalist), rings in her ears: “Blues is the soul of Chicago. Jazz is its intellect.” Both forms are part of the very fabric and culture of the city. So Officer Olinger is ready to hear the best—the kind of music that pierces right into the heart.

Chandler Olinger

Officer Olinger demonstrates her beauty and her talents.

Readers must understand that Officer Olinger, due to her profession, deals with drama all day long. (By the way, she is as cute in her police uniform as in any fabulous selection from her bottomless closet.) With a background in solving the city’s most dastardly deeds, she is demanding in her entertainment tastes. Perhaps drama is attracted to her, or maybe she just enjoys experiencing the extremes, the result is that Officer Olinger takes her position as leading critic very seriously. Not only does she dress the best, she only frequents the best establishments. This one tonight, she hopes, has the potential to satisfy.

Officer Olinger has proven in the past, like the most astute of officers in this Roaring 20’s city, that she is more loyal to her friends than the law. Tonight it is Miss Medier’s boyfriend’s club opening. So politics is politics. Obligation requires that she attend each of Chicago’s entertainment establishments at least once. But she relishes clubs of quality—inspired all day at the notion of kicking back to great tunes. Given that this is a time of prohibition and Miss Medier is her great buddy, she will overlook what kind of juice is served to the guests and enjoy some herself. In fact, she slips a small silver flask of her own along with her revolver into her white fir that so perfectly compliments her dress.

With one last check in the mirror at the shear loveliness looking back at her, she assumes her lady saunter and slinks down the street to the new Naked Blues Club, owned by Doctor Heavy Writer.

Upon arrival to this newest speakeasy, once the secret door slides open, Officer Olinger is presented with a cozy room stuffed with dancing friends from the past and the present. Amazed at the reunion-like festivities, she discovers that those who were on vacation came back early, those away on business had changed their schedules, and several newly wed couples rushed their weddings so they could attend this historic opening!

crowd celebrating blues club

Leading present and former citizens tap feet or boogie to the greatest blues artists of the era: Miss Sylvan Shilling; Mister Jake Hansome; Miss Faelann Magic and Mister Charlie Duffield, Mister Art Clift and Misses Kathryn Button Clift; Mister Shepham Moorlord and Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord; Miss Sara Nymphea; Miss Eleanor Medier and Doctor Heavy Writer, owner.

Chicago emerges on the national scene as developing a distinctive form of blues. With the influx of many talented citizens from the south seeking, and finding, opportunity in Chicago, music sparks are flying and filling the south side with new sounds just as the cigarette smoke billows in a cloud up to the ceiling in the new club filled with dancers twirling before her eyes. Peering through the happy haze, she spots the wealthiest couple in town (or is it Officer Olinger’s astute political sensitivity that she sees them first?). But her attention is probably captured too by Misses Moorlord’s elegant red patterned gown, obviously expensive and perfectly fitted. All content audiences are now much more familiar with Misses Moorlord’s anatomy since the opening of the burlesque where her fame has risen to stardom. But the red dress she boasts proves that concealing can be as sexy as revealing! Nonetheless, Officer Olinger’s eyes continue to scan the room, next (good choice too) she greets the host Doctor Writer, but pulls her buddy Miss Medier from his dancing arms into a hug of her own. Casting her eyes over Miss Medier’s understated color choice of shimmery black, the publisher’s gown proves intriguing with its thigh-high side slit, Officer Olinger notes approvingly. She enjoys observing the other ladies in town more than the more predictable flappers, but she doesn’t discount them for their entertainment value.

Speaking of ladies, Officer Olinger is thrilled to spot Misses Tiffy Vella at the bar. Another of such visual perfection, Miss Vella is the officer’s biggest competition for fashion appropriateness. Because Officer Olinger is one of the most ambitious ladies around, she has the courage to take on a famous fashion designer for the bar of standards to reach! As said, nothing but the best for Officer Olinger.

Further study of the room is quick because front and center, capturing the amusement of all, is the best partier in town, Miss Wilamenia Zarco. Now this party has it all! Officer Olinger’s best friends, biggest fashion competition, and most legendary socialite of all are present. With a beaming smile on her face, Officer Olinger embarces all her beloved intimates and acquaintances but then pauses for a moment to evaluate why such a huge crowd had arranged their schedules to show up: the music. What kind of taste does Doctor Writer have? Will he live up to the esteem of Miss Medier who obviously thinks highly enough of his sponsorship to help hostess? (It is never fun when the guy chosen by a girl friend is a disappointment.) And, more importantly, will the music live up ot the expectations of Officer Olinger herself?

Wila dances with friend

Miss Zarco brings her own dance partner with the optimistic name of "Penis." She also shows off her drum pounding talents, proving that she has got Chicagos soul in her heart. Miss Slyvan and Miss Stormy

Ears wide open, Officer Olinger is swept up into the full vigor of era’s best blues artists including Robert Johnson (Sweet Home Chicago is the tune that greets her) Willie Dixon, Johnny Lee Hooke,  Jack Dupree, Hound Dog Taylor, Sonny Boy Williamson, Big Mama Thornton, and even BB King and Muddy Waters. Delighted becasue these match her own opinions of who is worth giving an evening of her attention, Officer Olinger loses herself in the new moves she has practiced with such grace. Consistent in her discriminatory tastes, she must dance the best too—with or without a partner, its the spirit that matters. Sometimes the couples can be annoying—and since her dear friend Miss Medier has become a member of one (though happy for her friend), Officer Olinger relishes time with her other single friends. Sometimes even Officer Olinger herself has special friends, but a leader must balance both—and of course few men fit her high standards.

Spotting the piano, Officer Olinger leaps gracefully onto the stage and jams with the musicians! Quite talented, hers high opinion of herself isn’t inflated. Clever and inventive, she is Chicago’s star police officer. Women have to be twice as good as men to gain recognition and Officer Olinger has been awarded and promoted several times. Her brain might get absorbed in crime mysteries, but her heart is lost in the realm of music that goes right into the bones. She pounds out tunes on the piano blending with and inspiring the other musicians and dancers into a boogie frenzy.

blues club patrons

Couples enjoy the blues because so many songs are romantic. Newlyweds Misses Kathryn Button Clift and Mister Art Clift swirl to the music; Mister Lancelot Skytower and Miss Carriee Sorbet relax with many places to sit and mellow..

Perfectly dressed, astutely connected, and professionally respected, it is easy for Officer Olinger to be so confident. She has it all! And now with a new favorite blues club, where she can share great taste with her best friends, where she can take a mini vacation from the law, where the art is what matters, the officer relaxes for a moment in one of the large leather arm chairs and sighs: life doesn’t get better than this.

blues club open

Miss Medier loves to dance to the blues with owner Doctor Heavy Writer and is especially special to celebrate the final nuptuals of Misses Xyza Armistice Kiranov and Mister Mayor KJ Kiranov.

Vella’s Vision
April 1, 2011

Peaceful on the surface, much is going on in Chicago behind closed doors. In The Chicagoan‘s dedication to highlight the city’s fashion leaders, Miss Tiffy Vella‘s influence cannot be denied. After all, when arriving on the bridge over the Chicago River, Miss Vella’s exquisite jewelry shop welcomes all visitors and residents to the Michigan Avenue shopping district. Eclectica, Miss Vella’s current passion, keeps her from attending events of late. But the best parade of Miss Vella’s designs are on the ladies drifting in and out of Chicago’s many entertainment establishments.

The balance between reality and virtual reality is well expressed by Miss Tiffy Vella’s SL lifestyle. Visiting her sky design studio, stepping on green disks floating in the air like mini-islands, fear of falling is far away from the care-free experience of jumping from one to the other. On the one hand, SL mirrors RL, but on the other, it offers a freedom to make seem real what cannot be—which can be both fun and liberating. All that limits SL is imagination, and a visit to Miss Vella’s private studio expresses the possible blended with the impossible.

Miss Vella's studio
The top level of Miss Vella’s estate comprises her private studio, she describes as “my thinking space. Much of the time my body will be here, but my eyes will be in Photoshop, texturing.”

A talented jewelry designer, Miss Vella has three Eclectica shops with her mainstore as a floating island (two others in Chicago Roaring 20s and Seraph City). Certainly not afraid of heights, it seems Miss Vella spends most of her time these days in the sky, which is why she is so rarely seen on the streets of Chicago. As a fashion icon, she exemplifies craftsmanship and choice. Placing her emphasis on accessories, she has developed a creative clientele who construct their own unique design statements.

In a rush to wear a fabulous outfit, few understand the flexibility and originality present in accessories. A plain dress, a nondescript combination, or an over-worn selection, can be not only revived, but transformed by attention-grabbing features such as jewelry, gloves, scarves, or shoes. Whether contrasting, blending, or complementing, those who don’t experiment with such colorful options are missing out on a look’s final polish. Faster and more fun than buying a new outfit (and running the risk of a friend or acquaintance showing up in the same thing), expressing individuality through accessories extends wardrobe self-expression. Accessories polish the outfit, place the finishing attention that separates trend from sophistication. As components, Miss Vella’s designs inspire individuality.

Miss Vella's shops
Miss Vella has expanded from one small location to a large mainstore with three auxiliary shops, and a playful sense of humor for one so elegant.

I love clothes and have always loved 20’s fashion,” she enthused. By keeping her base outfits simple, she builds upon them with accessories in unique combinations. “I wear this really plain black dress from Ingenue a lot. Its easy to alter the look with a few accessories.” Customers benefit greatly from Miss Vella’s advice, bringing a modular approach to fashion structure. In talking about RL 20’s fashion, she addressed several of the dominant styles, some of which can be tolerated by the SL environment and some not:

• Flat-chested trend. “I read that women wound cloth around their chests to flatten themselves. I don’t see very many women opting for the flat chested look here. And really, what would be the purpose of being ultra pedantic over authenticity? Yet with no standards, all of SL would turn into a homogenous mass.” It does seem that few women are willing to change avatars in a direction considered unflattering. Authenticity, however, is preserved at all other costs! To dress properly is a requirement in Chicago—a commitment made by every resident. That, of course, must happen within reason.

• Bobbed hairstyle and commitment to short hair. It must be remembered that not all women were flappers! Ladies tend to wear their hair in twists and buns—though hats were are popular! A broader perspective is needed in what is authentic as many ladies are fond of their long hair and don’t wish to be sheered like young girls.

• Drop waists. “These are quite hard to do in SL. The system skirt is perfect for the high waisted 30’s gowns.” Instead of fashion emphasizing the drop waist, the hem length of skirts are more significant. Showing knees is taboo, as skirts just migrated from showing no legs at all to just ankles, an evolution very easy to handle virtually.

• Shoes. Good ones are hard to find, all shoppers seem to agree, So Miss Vella has taken on the challenge. “Shoes from the 20’s ones are tricky; they had quite low heels. I personally find them a little unflattering.” So her design adaptation preserves the 20’s look but evolves it into a flattering style that women will want to wear. Heel height becomes an issue of style because sore feet aren’t a problem. Miss Vella confesses to climbing mountains in high heels. She doesn’t “want to tromp about like Daisy Duck feet.” Style is everything, accenting an experience.

• Jewelry. Searching for beautiful jewelry became such a chore that Miss Vella started developing her own ideas. Her signature amazing line of pearls opened her business: selections of every color and a variety in construction. “I make jewellery moddable so colours can be adjusted if you have a few building skills. I don’t think I started off thinking like that but perhaps gradually expanded my ambitions towards” designs that are customizable.

Miss Vella describes the growth of her successful three-year-old jewelry business: “I started out small and now feel more confident about what I’d like my whole ‘look’ to be like. I had a 15x15m platform in the sky as my first shop. Its still the same shop, but bigger now.” She built components that would become an integrated line of accessory products.

Miss Vella at home
When at home, Miss Vella spends most of her time using her living room like her office. She models “Hyde” by Sonatta Morales as she lounges on the couch, her favorite outfit.

Balancing her time between design and running a shop is a daily concern. “I make sure I do fun things too, like running around and shooting zombies when I need to. But it takes quite a few hours a day to really stay on top of all the tasks … not just the designing. I don’t rush them though. Sometimes its weeks between releases. Most time in designing is actually spent doing the work—putting the pieces together physically. I’ll go through phases…..thinking phases, building phases. Lots of it looks like ‘mucking about time’ for example, playing about with prims to get the right movement in a bunch of feathers. I use flexible prims. Testing time is me walking about seeing how everything looks from different angles, seeing what happens as the model changes position.” Her perfectionism shows in her innovative designs. Chicago benefits greatly from her quiet yet pervasive fashion influence.

Please visit Miss Vella’s site at

FLASH: From Sparks to Flames
March 23, 2011

If it is true that sex and romance sell publications, then this issue should fly off the shelves! Chicago gets steamier as spring starts thawing the icey edges of the winter-worn city! This week kicked up emotions and blood pressures as residents released pent-up winter frustrations. It is good for the city to relieve tension because too many people have been hidden quietly behind closed-doors lately which makes for some tame news days. This week made up for it with the most tantalizingly colorful developments ever!

For those residents who are under age, squeamish, or easily embarassed, this week’s activites may stretch comfort-zones. As a dedicated reader of the news in Chicago, get ready for the provocative! Three stories represent different sides of the emotional spectrum: “The Ultimate Fantasy,” “Romancing the Writer,” and “Swingingly Sweet.”

The Ultimate Fantasy

As the second largest city in the country, Chicago never takes second place in fashion, culture, entertainment, or drama. To be a great city means to offer something for everyone. Between the elegance of The Fiume, the warmth of The Boom Boom, and the casualness of Bea’s Chop Shop, it makes sense that Chicago needs a smokier and more seductive offering. So to the delight of all sensually-inclined residents, The Empire Burlesque, owned by Mister Shepham Moorlord, premiered Sunday night.

Featuring dancers Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord, Miss Una Woodrunner, and Miss Mercedes Faith, this carefully crafted and enticing show pleased the very well-behaved audience. Undoubtedly there will be more viewer participation in upcoming shows, as such sexually-rich performances are very popular. Tastefully hosted by ever-helpful Mister Dino Fyanucci, he served as a brief announcer (nothing against him personally, but avatars weren’t there to view him).

Patrons relax as the show is about to begin: Mister Clyde Haven with Miss Gwendolyn Jenvieve; Miss Bea Shamrock with Mister Jakob Faulds; Miss Debella Deceit; Mister Stevie Underby; and Miss Candy Cindy with Miss Lilone Dimitriaski.

With a comfortably crowded audience, every seat had a good view of the well-designed stage. With VIP tables in the front to plush red velvet lounging theater chairs arranged in interaction-inviting groups, the elegant theater envelopes the audience.

Wila considers

Before the show starts, Miss wilamenia Zarco contemplates: how she might dance on such a stage? But she soon gives way to those more costumed and practiced, her imagination inspired.

Magnificently staged, costumed, and narrated, the Empire Burlesque brilliantly presents the essence of seduction and fantasy. Pushing right up to the edge of appropriateness, patrons will appreciate the originality, descriptiveness, and banter. The three dancers fill a show as 30 might!! Everyone present admired the dexterity, inventiveness of moves, and choreography. As dancers shimmied through the audience, each guest could visually savor the gorgeous costumes and the beauties within them!

burlesque dance
The first show expressed a music box containing Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord as the deceptively-innocent ballarina, who is encouraged by Miss Una Woodrunner to exercize her imagination. Through seductive narrative, the dancers became lost in their interaction, movements, and descriptions.
Shepham Moorlord

Mister Shepham Moorlord, the richest businessman in town and owner of this new Empire Burlesque Theater not only has the best seat in the house, but acts as though the show was designed especially for him! Since his wife is one of the dancers, he could be right.

Surprisingly silent, the well-attended crowd must have been spell-bound by the sounds, sights, and sensations! Characteristically. Miss wilamenia Zarco had plenty to say—quips and observations almost as entertaining as what was happening onstage!

Taking viewers on a journey of personal exploration, it is possible that the men in the audience reacted a little differently than the women. When asked if they enjoyed the show the next day, the audience-women thought it was “great.” It is obvious how the men reacted, so they didn’t need to be asked.

Though normally a journalist will happily stick a hand into the flames of controversy for a good quotation; in this family-friendly publication, such daring is impossible. Quite frankly, Miss Eleanor Medier, the publisher of this writing, spends a lot of time in a variety of places, and she had never heard such creative concepts presented this way before. So, appropriately for the tone of this publication, to quote the narrative out of context would be unfair to its full impact and experience.

Mercedes Faith

Miss Mercedes Faith lights up the stage with showing how creative purple silk, or the lack thereof, can be.

Although as much colorful fashion was splendidly displayed by the ladies in the audience, all eyes were rivited to the beauties onstage. Even sometimes mingling with the crowd, the dancer’s tantalizing movements were only surpassed by their running dialogue with their fantasties! As each dancer progressed through shedding more and more fabric, discreetly Miss Medier took fewer and fewer pictures.

Starla dances

Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord could make the most resplendent peacock, and many of the ladies in the audience, blush with showing how to use the magnificent feathers in new ways.

General readerhip-friendly photographs, albeit artfully presented, can only capture one-half of the show, sorry readers. Having to be there for the rest, make sure to be over-age, fantasy-prone, and not exceedingly naive. Although Miss Medier is old enough, but with little experience in this genré, her date, Doctor Heavy Writer (story below), was more than happy to offer his help to edit these photographs in her dark room. With commitment to the publishing requirements, Miss Medier did think it best for her solo judgement to edit, though appreciative of Doctor Writer’s generous good nature.

Una's last dance

The finale is danced by Miss Una Woodrunner in respectful (or maybe not so respectful) tribute to St. Patrick's Day earlier this week.

Romancing the Writer

The city is still buzzing with questions about The St. Valentine’s Day Massacre and the events that confused the press coverage of the full story. Certainly there are guilty perpetrators at large, make no mistake, but blamed innocence also deserve to be exhonerated.

On that fateful Sunday a few weeks ago, Miss Eleanor Medier (trusted journalist for this treasured The Chicagoan publication), had an intriguing encounter with a tall dark handsome stranger in town. It may be remembered that this fussy writer also regularly criticises the fashion sense and behavior of the men in Chicago (with very few exceptions, as covered by these pages). This is perhaps why she rarely dates. Such a sarcastic nature is usually avoided by the oppostie sex! So naturally she was caught off-guard on that day, and was quite disappointed when her Prince Charming disappeared. It seemed he was distracting her from covering the biggest story of the decade! But, alas, he is innocent of any connection to the tragedies on that day.

As a prominent doctor from New York, Doctor Heavy Writer had a meeting here with the newly formed American Medical Association, who began in Chicago twenty years ago. Sadly, Doctor Writer had chosen that fateful day to check out the city, his meeting scheduled for the next morning. He had driven from New York and was staying with friends who own a nearby farm.

Possibly interested in Chicago as a good place to open up a new practice, he wanted to get a feeling for what the city had to offer, being used to the large urban environments on the east coast. He had stopped in the Boom Boom for its lengendary blueberry juice, but found it empty on that Sunday afternoon—perhaps forgetting that this is a time of prohibition. So he was delighted when an attractive potential dance partner walked into the room, dressed just as casually as he was, though she had a camera in her hand. It seemed one of those moments of fate to him. Almost too good to be true—and he had to play it cool—he did get caught up in the dance.

After meeting Miss Medier, he began to drive back to his friend’s farm, when his Model T broke down on the way. Dismayed that he had to walk the last five miles and that his friend has no telephone (only about 1/3 of the households do), it took him all night to fix his car so he could make it to his meeting the next day at the AMA Headquarters downtown.

With business concluded, Doctor Writer drove home to New York, untangled his personal affairs, and packed his bags for Chicago. Puttering and sputtering across five states, he had frequent car trouble (his first purchase after establishing himself will be a new car) and found telephones very scarce. He had thought of contacting Miss Medier, but figured he would wait until he got settled. Once he arrived, he became so tied up with meeting the right people to set up a practice, he got swept away with preparations. When he did finally show up at Miss Medier’s office, she had already written nasty things about him for distracting her from the biggest story of the decade!

the dance

Miss Eleanor Medier and Doctor Heavy Writer enjoy dancing together, sharing an eclectic taste in music and venues.

Appologies accepted on both sides, they went dancing—what else? And hence they began to spend a lot of time together. Doctor Writer and Miss Medier seem to have much to talk about, sharing similar cultural interests and concerns. They also compare an optimism about the growth and potential in Chicago. Each committed professionally, citizen’s news and health care needs of should both be expertly serviced. New in town, Doctor Writer is pleased to get to know all the residents and to help with any mishaps that physically befall them in the daily drama of the Chicago streets.


Miss Medier and Doctor Writer enjoy many recreational features available in Northern Illinois.

Swingingly Sweet

After all the formality, drama, and romance of Chicago’s recent events or activities, there is no better way to release tensions and relax with friends than at Bea’s Chop Shop. Unwind to fun tunes by 20s greats and sway with the jazzy bluesy flavor, thus the romance of the era is enhanced.


More casual than the other clubs in Chicago, Bea's Chop Shop is a hidden speakeasy that enjoys patronage from every level of society. Since they are secretly enjoying themselves, it is best not to identify them in this caption.

Singles and couples alike enjoy this venue—though many alone may not stay that way. Chicago is a romantic place, the era spiced with new freedoms in fashion, behavior, and acceptibility. Speakeasys bring all these factors together, encapsulating the flavor of the corner hidden smoke-music-filled club. Bea’s Chop Shop, owned by Miss Bea Shamrock comes the closest to capturing the environment, experience, and even fantasy of the times.


Although burlesque was developed in the middle of the previous century, its risque form and carefree atmosphere fit in well with the Roaring 20s. Purposely created to satire popular norms, stretch acceptable conventions, and push what is appropriate, it was generally irreverent and bawdy. The amount of sexual innuendos and strip tease performances varied considerably. In Chicago, competition between theaters caused them to become less satirical and more sexual, creating voluptuously glamourous stars. The Jazz Age Chicago reports: “Performances by Chicago’s burlesque stars were among the bawdiest and most risque in the nation. By the 1920s, striptease acts involving partial or total nudity were standard fare at most of the city’s burlesque theaters.”

Celebrating Dedication
March 18, 2011

Prohibition doesn’t seem to inhibit Chicago entertainment style. Publicly, activities are lubricated by creative cocktails such as “Blueberry” Juice, “Snowballs,” and “Lemonade.” But privately, many households still boast of stockpiles stored in basements, personal stills in backrooms, and concealed flasks that get shared during events. Saint Patrick’s Day in Chicago is a particular challenge to legality, as everyone knows how the Irish love to drink!!!

With steins of nonalcoholic “beer,” Mayor KJ Kiranov and Miss Xyza Armistice, the consummate hosts, made up for any lack of strong refreshments with outstanding decorations and music for the St. Patrick’s Day Relay for Life Benefit Ball. In fact, to focus more on contributing to the great cause for the American Cancer Association rather than on lack of lubrication, is a healthy and worthy shift of emphasis.

X & KJ dance

Elegant and humorous, hosts Mayor KJ Kiranov and Miss Xyza Armistice entertain a festive turnout

On  All are Irish on St. Patty’s Day, and with a unifying exuberance, the political squabbles between ethnic groups were set aside for a philanthropic spirit. Such a large percentage of new residents into Chicago do come from Ireland, so respectfully finding a great excuse for a fantastic party is politically astute. Thursday evening, the ball culminated in the costume contest, drawing a healthy crowd of creatively-clad residents. And, swept up in the spirit of celebration, the amount of green outfits displayed was quite impressiveI


Always a good idea to show the most fashionable ladies demonstrates why Chicago is one of the fashion capitals of the world: Miss Bea Shamrock, Miss Nuala Maracas, and Miss Arizona all show why green is such a popular color.

The Hotel LaSalle offers the most elegant of settings for the swirling couples and self-absorbed singles. Dancing was shared by all!! And the decorations, complete with rainbows and pots of gold, a waterfall also demonstrating nature’s best color combinations, and shamrocks everywhere, all cares were cast aside! Of course those present contributed generously to the worthy cause. Sadly, the suffering targeted seemed quite far removed from such a setting. Perhaps contributing to the less-fortunate inspired the partiers to enjoy themselves even more! As a psychological benefit for helping the less fortunate, riches of experience and environment are undoubtedly enjoyed with deeper appreciation and gratitude!

St Patricks dance

Gracing the center of the dance floor, winners Miss Udinetta Shilova and Mister Bartolo Breda were irresistible.

At the end of the evening, votes were taken and winners awarded. Not surprising, the winners for the best costumes were Miss Udinetta Shilova and Mister Bartolo Breda. From the moment they arrived, their charm and elegance were central.

unsung award winners

Dancers swirl in the elegant setting of lebrichons, shamrocks, and rainbows: Miss Una Woodrunner, Miss Sylvan Shilling with Miss Stormy Pixelmaid, and Mister Shepham Moorlord with Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord.

However, if there were an award for most humorous, it would have to go to Mayor Kiranov. An award for cutest could be shared by Miss Stormy Pixelmaid and Miss Sylvan Shilling. Sexiest would have to go to Mister Shepham Moorlord and Misses Starla Huntress Moorlord. And most romantic to Miss Xyza Armistice. Best dancer would undoubtedly be appreciated by Miss Una Woodrunner. The most purposely-focused winner would be The Chicagoan‘s own Miss Eleanor Medier, who, with professional commitment, shot these pictures as she danced to the side.

st patricks day

Miss Eleanor Medier enjoys some good moves while performing her duty as journalist.

Congratulations go to those who did win for costumes and will win when the treasure hunt is over this weekend. Apparently there are pots of gold hidden around the city. Yet before they are all discovered, The Chicagoan feels obligated to highlight those who made the event happen: and those who went to such trouble to be so entertaining!


Green is a fantastic anchor color for a party—in fact the color alone is a perfect reason to dance!


Prohibition, supposedly, was enforced only for public places—hence alcohol could not be commercially sold or purchased. Privately, citizens were allowed to have alcohol inside their homes, only. Hence, most households had stills in the basement and developed a personal inventory. Rather than inspire people to drink less, prohibition inspired them to drink more at home and more creatively when in public.